I rant, therefore I am

Adios

2008-09-15T03:21:00.000-07:00

Holding back the tears
Reminiscing about the years

Of the games we lost and won
and the kids that we pwned

Having fun with great laughter
We all lived happily ever after

Ditching school because
We were way too cool

I can never take back those days
Days of joy and of play

It's all but a memory
just an emotional reverie

For now I say ,from today til forever
Goodbye to you who came my way.

Adios my friend

All good things come to an end

2008-05-10T07:38:00.000-07:00

It's been quite some time since my last post, something like four months in fact and things have gone for the better surprisingly in the intervening four months. My very first conceptions for this blog was for it to be a place of unbridled fury and vehement distaste, which was at the time the main things that gripped my mind. Yet four months on all those feelings have all but evaporated, the pessimist within me has slithered back into its cave and replaced by a cynical optimist, I still harbor some form of resentment towards various matters, yet I no longer feel the inevitability of such matters and its gloomy entailments. So with that I have decided to revive this blog and lead it in a new direction, much like a phoenix reborn among among the ashes brighter and livelier than ever.

I do not know why I'm felling better than ever, my usual excuse of Arsenal's form deciding my mood for the next couple of weeks really doesn't hold any ground anymore since if such a theory was to be true, I'd really should be on the brink of suicide given their less than inspiring performances over the second half of the season. I really am not able to put a finger for my sudden rejuvenation, maybe its the apathy, maybe its the possibility of university, a chance to ply my (admittedly limited)skills abroad in a new environment. Whatever the reason Its good to be good.

It is with fitting irony that i start off this new era of my blog with a post about the end of an era in my life. Yesterday the 9th of May was (officially) the last day of college for me and it truly is a sobering thought. The last 13 months of college life has really shaped a huge part of who I am, intellectually and spiritually. Friends have been made along with enemies too, although I do try my best to steer clear from inciting animosity between me and anyone else. Suffice to say my experiences with my mates of 0703PM13 has been nothing short of brilliant.

When I first started college I just came back from a 9 week long crack at being an exchange student in Spain and I was practically bursting with excitement come the first day of coll. Yet it was sort of anticlimactic with our first class being taught by the biggest fattest bitchiest non cock wielding disgrace of a woman lecturer, that's more words than she deserves in fact. Well it wasn't all bad, at least I ended college with the greatest lecturer ever giving us a farewell befitting such an occasion in our last lesson in college. It would be a really tedious process talking about the highs and lows of my time in coll so I figured giving you guys an impression of the tumultuous beginnings and an affectionate end to my college life would give a a good enough lead on how the past year panned out.

It really has been a great ride, thrills and spills along the way with seriously unhealthy levels of laughter all round, its been great fun PM13, I never thought it would be but thank heavens I was proven wrong.

Society - The Evil Empire

2008-01-19T10:20:00.000-08:00

Society has to be one of the most despicable things around, it basically uses you according to its needs and wants, think your life is yours to live? Think again.

We all suffocate in a vacuous structure promoting individuality and personal excellence but all for what? All it does is shapes you into a piece of corporate pawn ready to be used by the corporate world, to be called upon when we are needed. Most of us die young, sometimes too many hearts d young, that's not to say my heart is gone now, but i fear i may have to concede my 'spirited teen years' and replace it with ' responsible adult activities'. We'll have to work our asses off in a job that we have no passion for at all, a job forced unto us by the corporates in order to support our lives.

Society is a sham in shambles. Do what you're supposed to do, think how you're supposed to think, act how you're supposed to act, continue to follow whatever society calls for and you'll turn into a fine piece of meat for the system to gorge upon before you're to old and can't be chewed upon anymore. Then when you've turned old, you recede to the glories of bingo nights and game shows, filling the gaps in the mockery of the life that you lived, waiting for the great unknown known as death, whoopee! By this time you would have wished how you changed some part of a chapter in the book of your life, realising you should have done something differently decades ago to improve your life, to go against the will of the system before you were replaced by another piece of meat just as unknowing as yourself. And then there is death, heaven or hell or absolute nothingness, who knows? Life sounds fun isn't it? Well it'd be much more fun without society fucking around with it.

So my question is this, can we change the way we live our lives? Other than being a piece of prime meat, can we actually live life the way we want it to be? If so how? Cause I'd love to know

Afterlife and its entailments....

2007-12-30T08:26:00.000-08:00

My query is not about the existence of the afterlife, but rather why you believe or not believe in it. Personally I do not believe in it at all, I'm fundamentally an atheist with a rather complex form of atheism which will be discoursed in other posts. My main reason for my incredulity of the conept of afterlife is its absurdity. For one thing it has absolutely no ground for it, why should we earn our place in heaven or somewhere else? Why aren't we born equal and good, all ready for eternal life straightaway without the hassle of going through a life of suffering and commiting sins, etc? I do not take the explanation for primal sin an adequate one because quite frankly it is a load of bollocks, and then some. What the hell was the tree in the garden of heaven for? Who would need it in paradise? God? Certainly not, he could quite clearly differentiate between the the already unambiguous sides of good and evil. So quite obviously the only being that would profit from it was man, but even then they were forbidden to eat it, why? Since God is said to know everything, surely he must've known that Adam would disobey his orders. It all seems a bit shoddy don't you think? Neither do I believe in reincarnation although without a bit trepidation as compared with my thoughts on the afterlife. Let's say our soul is born immature, a diamond in the rough, so to speak, and it takes several lives, for the soul to mature and achieve nirvana or satori or whatever. My problem is with the final state, why this? Why should I try to reach it? I think eternal reincarnation with the perk of remembering all our previous lives would be utterly riveting, think of all the lives I would be able to take hold of, being male and female, rich and poor, and a dog too......

End Time

2007-12-10T09:28:00.000-08:00

The end of the universe is inevitable. It will either contract a zero size with infinite temperature, or expand to an infinite size of zero temperature, it is something we just do not know. Given the fact that this may not occur for billions upon billions of years from now(according to cosmologists), one cannot escape the entailments, humanity will not go on forever.

None of us can properly say with absolute certainty that the universe will end in a billion years or that it will survive long enough for me to see tomorrow's sunrise.

Either way, the possibility of the universe existing only for the next billion years is of little or no consequence in terms of deciding what is or isn't worth doing. Promote democracy? Who gives a shit? A free world ain't gonna do much good in about a billion years. Park my ass and watch Southpark? Now that's what I call living your life. At least when the universe blows up, I'll die laughing.

Our souls do not track our accomplishments or failures, but what it does is embrace our emotions such as happiness, sorrow, love, etc. We should experience the things that enrich our soul, because when we lieave this cruel world, it is our soul that will be brought along for the ride.

So what is still worth doing? Is life any more precious? Or is it trivialized? Or is the Death of the Universe so temporally remote that mention of it carries no weight at all? Given only 10 years left before the universe tears itself apart, what would you do?

Is it really worth a thousand words?

2007-11-28T02:30:00.000-08:00

Since i can't be arsed to write anything, and the reading public has fell in love with my dog, I suppose a couple of pictures would please everyone.

Living life to the fullest

2007-11-12T11:17:00.001-08:00

We've all heard this statement before usually spouted by some eggheaded and perky idiot who goes around talking about how one should live life to the fullest. What pisses me off the most is the people who talk about this absolutely nonsensical statement usually live their lives as those portrayed in stupid TV commercials or those read in glossy magazines. The way the media has manipulated and dictated the way so many people live today just confounds me. Are our minds really that easy to be manipulated into thinking we need to do this or do that to actually count as living out our lives? Think about it for a moment, what does living life to the fullest really mean? I mean what do you do? Go around climbing mountains all day long? How many people can actually afford to live life to the fullest? Certainly not me, I can't afford to go on an African safari or climb the Matterhorn. People who actually live life to the fullest are the rich and fortunate ones, most people do as best they can to stay afloat, a lot of people may say it but hardly any of them actually DO it. Live like there's no tomorrow? If today was to be the last day of my life i wouldn't spend my time climbing some stupid ol mountain or whitewater rafting, I would spend it with my family, like every other sensible person would do. But wait, how can spending time with my family be living life to the fullest? Hmmm, it doesn't!! It just goes to show how inherently flawed the statement is! Living life to the fullest aint gonna pay the bills, living life to the fullest aint gonna pay me through university, such overly optimistic and wholly unrealistic statements should never be uttered.

Apathy - Agent of Destruction

2007-11-12T09:53:00.000-08:00

Well after two previously otiose posts I think it is time to move on to more worthwhile topics, and one such topic is the issue of not giving a shit about anything, or to be succinct, apathy.

Apathy, a word that has had such a profound impact in my life these last couple of weeks. What's apathy you may ask? Well the Merriam-Webster online dictionary describes it as
1. lack of interest or concern
2. lack of feelings or emotion

Well my kind of apathy relates to the first definition, such things like exams and university applications, problems with friends and teachers, problems in my studies and college have led me to the brink of insanity. That is until i stumbled upon this wonderful word I found while surfing through the internet, apathy, a state of disinterest, i was truly intrigued, intrigued by the fact that I can release myself from the clutches of teen life. I mean let's face it its not exactly a walk in the park being a teen, and the whole idea of being totally indifferent to whatever may happen is like the drug I've been searching for.

I shared this new discovery with one of my friend who incidentally also stumbled upon this theory at about the same time as I did. Both of us were similar in many ways, both teens in the middle of their exams, at the crossroads of our young life, both of us trying to figure out a way to find a solution to our teenage angst. Now my friend, Shravan, embraced it more readily than I did mainly because of the kind of conditioning we Chinese kids undergo from our parents, being taught about the responsibilities we have to the family and to ourselves. But as time went on I got accustomed to not giving a shit about the happenings in my life, things like exams and university just couldn't cause me any consternation. It was like I had a new lease of life, it truly felt like a weight has been lifted from my thoroughly exhausted shoulders, I could go on with life without being bothered by my responsibilities and other such bullshit.

But sadly not unlike all the drugs out there apathy has it's side effects, and not particularly nice ones at that. Fogr one thing being indifferent to your studies would mostly like mean bad grades, bad grades would mean not getting into good universities, and not getting into good universities would mean not having a bright future in life. Well that's the stereotypical view of most people on the pathway to success and sadly I'm a victim of such a view. And today for some reason I just realised, apathy is not a form of escapism, it is a fucking excuse, an excuse borne out of the greatest evil known to mankind, PROCRASTINATION!!!

But the issue of procrastination is to be left for another post, the main point is anybody foolish enough like myself to be lulled into believing in apathy should be treat it with as much hate as a Jew would treat a Nazi, that is gasing the stupid idea to hell!

5 Reasons why my dog would totally OWN your dog

2007-11-10T08:36:00.000-08:00

1. He is my dog, that is reason enough for him to kick your dog's ass.
2. He possesses the scariest stare possible.
3. He runs faster than your dog and therefore your dog would not be able to escape his clutches. Yes he broke the land speed record for dogs, beating Lassie by 4.2 seconds, that's fact so u better fuckin believe it.
4. He eats beef jerky and nails for breakfast, so he has claws of steel, plus his balls is so hard he uses them to knock his enemies down, KAPOWWW.
5. He once killed a cow just by barking at it, a post mortem of the cow revealed how its innards were turned into goo, so don't you mes with my dog.

First post, no big deal

2007-11-09T07:44:00.000-08:00

Well this is my first try at blogging.Fuck you